I had to urgently freeze my eggs. No, I’m not talking about the eggs I bought from supermarket for breakfast. I’m talking about reserving my fertility. Honestly I have thought about it since I was… 30. Just thinking, not acting. But now, cancer really made it happen.

I’m 37, this is not the age that I could say confidently “I still have many years to think about if I want to have a baby”. And whatever anyone says, the social pressure of having children is still real, I feel that pressure (I just ignore it 😂). But deep down inside, I’m really not sure if I want to have children. It’s not that I never want to have children at all, I just feel like children is something in the “future tense”. I know, the biological clock doesn’t agree with me 🥹

I’m type of person that likes to plan everything in advance, and want to secure “plan B” in everything. However, when it comes to freezing eggs, I couldn’t act. It’s easy and rational to think about it, but to make it happen is another story. Financially, I could afford that, but it is not the amount that I could spend without thinking thoroughly. Besides, freezing eggs is not something you can just “pay and finish”, it’s a procedure that makes impact on the body. I have always been very nervous when going to gynecologist, so just thinking about having to do the ultrasound several times during the procedure makes me want to forget egg freezing totally. But the main reason I delayed this matter is: I don’t feel like I’m 37 at all. Well, I know, you could tell me: “It’s normal, none of us feels like our age, we always feel like we were much younger”. And how a 37 years old “woman” should feel like anyways? I just feel that I still have a lot of time, so freezing egg was absolutely not my “daily thought”.

And then, cancer came. As I already told you here, in my initial dialog with the oncologist, when I heard that I had cancer, my mind was suddenly overloaded with thoughts, but idea of egg freezing was totally absent. I’m very happy that they offered it, I said “yes” immediately without thinking a second about if I want it or not. When it comes to cancer, time is gold, I don’t want to spend anytime making decision. Yes, there is a risk of making wrong decision, but I just wanted my treatment to begin as soon as possible. I knew that the egg freezing procedure would take some time, so I didn’t want to delay my treatment even more just by… thinking.

The initial consultation

After deciding to freeze my eggs on Friday, April 19, 2024, I was immediately scheduled for an appointment with the reproduction department on April 29, 2024. The Norwegian healthcare system often faces criticism for being slow in handling “not-dying-immediately” diseases. However, I’m pleased to see that when it comes to a serious diagnosis, they act swiftly. As a cancer patient, I’ve been given a “VIP ticket with fast-track access” throughout the system. Typically, the wait time for an IVF procedure in a public hospital can range from 10 to 36 months, but I don’t have that kind of time. Throughout the process, I’ve seen just how busy the reproduction department is, and I genuinely appreciate that they allowed me to skip the queues 🫶. (I know I have cancer, that’s serious, but still 🫶).

My first appointment with the reproduction department was a very pleasant experience (although I didn’t want to be there at all 😔). The doctor called my name and expressed her sympathy for my situation. The checking was almost like a normal routine with gynecologist. She told me that my ovary looked normal to do an IVF procedure. After explaining carefully to me each step and I agreed to do it, she made a call to the oncology department to make sure that I had enough time to do the procedure. The information in my journal said that I would begin chemotherapy “as soon as possible”, and the IVF procedure would take around two weeks. I was a bit anxious about delaying chemotherapy, worried that it might give the tumor time to grow, but the oncologist assured me that it wouldn’t be an issue.

I had to begin with the ovarian stimulation on the same day, which means taking the hormone injection. After consultation with doctor, a nurse came to the room to instruct me how to inject the hormone. As I have never done it before, it was quite scary for me. I tried to act brave but she could see the fear in my eyes. She comforted me that it looked worse than it actually is.

The hormone

I left the department with a form to help me remember what I had to inject everyday. The prescription was already sent electronically, so I could just go to any pharmacy to pick up the medicine. I was prescribed to take 6 doses of Fostimon 300 IU, one everyday at 21:00 o’clock. The injection set looks like this:

The set contains to small bottles with power and liquid, you have to “mix and match” by yourself. It took me a bit longer the first time I did it, and the nurse was right, it was not so bad to inject it in my belly. It didn’t hurt at all but it was not something I enjoyed to do 😹 I was nervous everyday.

I didn’t feel any change in my body after the first injection actually, just a little “full” feeling in stomach like I had eat a lot. I slept well and my mood was OK.

The second to fourth dose went well also. I tried to vary the side of the belly where I injected the hormone so that the whole belly had to “suffer” 😏 Still, I didn’t feel any change in my body actually. My belly got a little bigger, but I was not quite sure if it was the eggs that grew or just the fat which coming quick as I begun to be more inactive (I had to drop workout during while I took hormone injections).

One of the side effects of hormone injection is mood swinging. However, I was not sure if it affected my emotion. Well, I was sad. Of course I was sad. I had just heard that I had cancer few days before. How could I be happy for that. I told my friends that it was quite cruel to give a newly diagnosed cancer patient high hormone doses. It is like having cancer is not gut-wrenching enough, like they have to make sure that I have to feel “correct” for the bad news 😭

Normally, doesn’t matter if the woman wants to freeze her eggs or needs help to be pregnant, the IVF procedure is always mentally prepared and well-planned. The first hormone injection is normally set on the first day of the cycle. It was not for me. They couldn’t wait until my next period as it would be more delay with my cancer treatment. So after four does of Fostimon, I got my period.

On the fifth dose, I also had to take another injection called Ferymadel. It means two injections at the same time 🥵 Ferymadel was a little bit easier as I didn’t have to mix the medicine, it was ready-to-use.

I had to take two doses of Ferymadel along with dose number 5 and 6 of Fostimon. As I understand, Fostimon is to stimulate the egg growing while Ferymadel prevents the big eggs being released. During the whole week with hormone injections, I had always been in OK condition, I ate well and slept well, just some mild headache and tired during the day. However, doing the injection everyday (especially the last two days with 2 injections) made me very stressful, not mention that I felt like I suddenly lost my freedom as I had to be at home before 21:00 everyday. So when I finished with the 6th dose of Fostimon (and 2nd dose of Ferymadel) on 29/04/2024, I was so naive to hope that it was enough.

I was excited for a new control the next day, 30/04/2024…

(To be continued)

Disclaimer: I’m not a doctor and I won’t give any medical advice. All I share on this blog is simply my personal experiences based on the treatment plan which was made specifically for me. However, if there is any topic you want me to share more about, please comment below 👇